“To be counted among the wise, you must learn to accept helpful criticism” (Proverbs 15:31, ERV).

I’ve been a fool and I’ve been wise. I don’t think we always are one or the other. We all probably struggle between the two.  There are two uncomfortable occasions in my life that helped me learn the key to wisdom, but the lessons were learned the hard way.

To begin with, I remember my first year teaching on the mission field. In those days, I was often sarcastic. It was part of my sense of humor. I joked around with a teacher next door to me but didn’t realize my sarcastic words' negative impact on her.

One day, she confronted me about it. I calmly took her rebuke and apologized. She said that I was really good at receiving correction.  The truth is, I wasn’t on the inside- I faked it. I actually didn’t accept her criticism well, even though she confronted me in a godly, loving way. I thought about her words for months before the Lord got a hold of my heart. Through my time praying about it and reading God’s word, the Holy Spirit convicted me to change. He used that rebuke to help me evaluate my words and how they affected others. I decided to stop being sarcastic.

A second time that stands out was when I was first married. My husband rebuked me for not saying sorry after a disagreement. His point was that I was focusing on the issue we disagreed about, rather than our relationship. I should have been sorry for hurting his feelings, even when I felt that I was in the right.  My stubbornness and pride were hurting our marriage. 

I’d like to say that I learned my lesson from the previous confrontation I shared, but actually, I acted more like a fool than one that was wise. It took me many years for God to humble me. Again, the change occurred as I prayed about it and allowed God to speak to me through His Word, sermons, wise friends, and Christian books.

Proverbs 15:31 says that we must learn to accept helpful criticism if we want to be wise. I agree with this wholeheartedly, but many times this is a process. In both stories that I shared, my initial reaction was that of a fool, but the Lord helped me to become wise. Proverbs 1:7 says that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge. He is the key to wisdom.

If you struggle with receiving correction, take time to bring your issue before the wisest One of all. Be open to change as the Holy Spirit counsels and convicts your heart. Then not only will you be blessed, but you will dwell among the wise.

So what is the key to becoming wise? In my experience, it has been learning to humbly receive godly correction and surround yourself with those who are wise. Most importantly, we need to stay rooted in God’s Word and allow Him to speak words of wisdom into our hearts and souls.