If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.

- Matthew 18:15

Jesus commands his followers to honor folks who are sinning by approaching them personally and privately.

Our impulse is to do neither of these well. We want to go to someone else first. Maybe we want to pass the buck off to someone else for the confrontation. Or maybe we’re looking to be 100% confident that what they’re doing is wrong before we open the conversation.

Jesus is assuming that the sin is very clear. He doesn’t give a lot of guidance here for dealing with gray areas. And in our own culture, we’re slow to call anything “sin.” But if sin is a real thing with real consequences, we need to have a category for it. We need to be able to call it what it is and to deal with it.

We’ve been wrestling here in the office – in light of this command – with what to do when we’re not sure if the thing the person is doing is a sin or not. There are plenty of situations that would qualify here (and we’re not just talking about cheering for a rival basketball team!).

As we’ve reflected on it, we come to see the counterintuitive and counter-cultural wisdom in Jesus’ command.

Our relationships in Christ can withstand the awkwardness of a misperception or a misdiagnosis. A well-intentioned, private, honoring, concerned confrontation communicates love – even if we’re innocent.

And if we actually are engaged in a struggle with sin, the courageous risk our brother or sister took to broach the conversation with us with humility communicates a depth of love that gives us hope and strength to keep fighting.

What do you find challenging about this command from Jesus? What do you find helpful about this command from Jesus?