Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing.
- Luke 15:25

Where is the older son when the reckless younger son finally drags his sorry self back to the father’s house? He’s out in the field, of course, working hard like he always did!

What a good son! Hard-working. Faithful. Obedient. The older son lived a life that would have been socially and scripturally affirmed. He’s the kind of kid you hope you raise. At least, that’s how it appears.

Beneath the obedient behavior of the older son, a storm brews. Daily, he labors in the field, doing what he’s supposed to do. But, daily, quietly, resentment builds.

This is often the case with poster-children. They anchor a family during turbulent times. They stuff their frustration and pocket their pain so that everyone around them can focus on the crisis. But this comes at a great cost to their souls.

Some of us are “older sons.” Churches tend to be full of them. We follow the rules. People rely on us. You can find us working quietly in the field. And there’s a storm in our souls.

Over the next few days, we’ll watch the older son unravel. But today we want to shake loose the veneer of obedience.

For those of us who are hard-working “older children,” we can easily be deceived by our obedience. We do the good stuff we’re supposed to do and convince ourselves that that’s enough. We log hours of good work, but our interior lives become riddled with sinkholes of resentment and landmines of bitterness. This impacts our families, friendships and relationship with God.

Attending to our interior lives – asking “What’s happening in my heart as I do what I’m supposed to do?” – can keep our relationships from unraveling down the road.

And if there’s someone in your life who’s an anchor, a poster-child for obedience, and a source of stability and strength, we want to encourage you to take a little time to engage their hearts.

Ask them how they’re feeling about the dramatic situations that they’re stabilizing. Spend time with them that’s not focused on “work” or performance. Take the time to do something together that’s fun or rewarding. Who knows? God may use you to calm a secret storm in their souls.